NOTE: If you are queasy in any way, shape, or form. DO NOT read this post. It deals with things better left unsaid. I, however, have diarrhea of the mouth and have to say it anyway.
Today seemed to be all about the bathroom. Things started off normal as I went into work and finished my first project after only an hour. That was making it seem like a great day. After a while I had to use the restroom so I went over there to do so. As I was walking into the bathroom I clipped my Blackberry on the corner outcropping (my Blackberry is holstered on my belt...yes, like the geek I am) and barely caught it before it dropped to the floor.
Later, back at home, I was standing before the pot doing my usual "Mother Nature requirement" thing and I happened to glance down into the toilet as I reached forward to flush it. This turned out to be a mistake. You see, what I saw at the bottom of the toilet bowl both scared the hell out of me AND brought back terrible memories. Memories I thought I had repressed.
There was something small, cylindrical, brown, and MOVING at the bottom of the toilet. At first I thought it was just leftover debris from some business I had taken care of about half an hour previous, but it was too small for that. And the fact that it was moving gave me pause. The object could only be a worm. It was about half a centimeter long and scared me more than a large North American Grizzly Bear.
I promptly flushed the toilet again because I couldn't stand to look at it anymore. All I can do is pray that it didn't come out of me and that it came up through the pipes or something.
The reason this brought back bad memories was because while I was in Panama, I contracted various different types of parasites during my stay there. One of those types gets killed by a pill that you take with food. Then when it dies, all of the dead bodies (and larvae) get expelled out of your system...and not through your mouth.
If you have never sat down to do your business, got up, and saw that you just gave alien birth then you cannot possibly fathom the horror.
As I left the bathroom after washing my hands something else struck me as odd. My shower curtain is missing. I guess the housekeeping staff decided that I don't need one because I am so tidy when I shower....? Riiiiiigght!
So yeah, it was just a day where I should have stayed out of the bathroom altogether.
3 comments:
Ok my co-worker guessed the quote correctly. After he guessed it, I went and looked it up so I can not give his answer. Nice quote. It was bugging me so I had to ask my co-worker!!!
Ok, so we have a new winner this week: Mom's Co-worker guessed "Gladiator" correctly. Congratulations to "Unnamed" co-worker.
Better luck next week Mom :).
Yeah "Steve" guessed Gladiator. Thanks Dave. Looking forward to the next quote!
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